I Could Pee on This: And Other Poems by Cats (Gifts for Cat Lovers, Funny Cat Books for Cat Lovers)

I bought this book to read to the residents of a small ALF where I do volunteer work. They loved the silly cat poems so much, that one resident asked me to read it again about a month later.

Super cute, totally worth it for the chuckle. I bought this for a friend as part of an upcoming Christmas gift. I didnt fully open the book as I didnt want to crack the spine (its a fresh book!), but I took a peek and could make out some of the poems. Just charming. Small hardcover, makes a nice little coffee table book, bathroom book, part of a gift, would be pleasant as a get well gift as it is sure to bring on some good feels. To reiterate: this is a small book at 5" x 6", and is just 112 pages. Not 112 poems. I dont know how many. Lots of glossy pics. Was able to buy it at less than $10, so I figured that was a decent price for a gift. I had originally put this in a "list" several years ago, but it was much too pricy at the time. A good greeting card can easily be $5-9 these days, so I will be using this in a sense as a card. As in, I will jot a little note inside when I tuck this in among other things in the gift.

I could not love this book of poems more. Freaking hilarious. My kids have read it aloud repeatedly to anyone who will listen, and they quote it often. I love the CAT ANGST, and I love that it reads like traditional poetry (not like limericks) only from the perspective of cats. It's absolute perfection. I could say "purr-fection," but I'm not a dork.

Mr. Marciuliano, Catzilla would like to have a word with you. See that "Say What? You're kidding me!" look on his face in this picture? He wants to talk to you about your poem, "One Day." He says, "you may be funny, and you may know a few things about cats, but let me tell you. You are right that we are not equal, but every feline knows who's really in command, and we don't need to wear the pair of your slacks we just peed on to prove it. And seeing as we can reduce you silly humans to a pile of gibberish with a nonstop flood of puddles or aromatic piles, the people who feed us will *never* be our equals, and we cats know who's really in command here." So, Catzilla's comments aside, because yah, he totally wears the Emperor's hat in this house, and should we ever doubt it, he sends his sidekick, Sith Whispicus out to reinforce his demands...this is a funny book, if you've ever had a cat with a touch of the spiteful in him. Cough *Catzilla*. And mostly, I think the author gets it right. I bought this book for my daughter, but I did some reading myself when it came in today because when I had looked at the on-line preview, it made me laugh. And I always like a good laugh. I do have to say though, my favorite cat humor book remains "A Cat's Night Before Christmas," by Beard/Jones/Boswell. It used to leave me gasping for air every time I read it, until it became my daughter's favorite book as a toddler. And we read it over, and over, and over because that's what toddler's do. And being able to quote it from memory allows me to breath when it's read, but I can still smile when thinking about it. So that's a good one to try too, and very on point if you're a cat owner. But otherwise, I thought this one was funny in a more artsy kind of way, and I know my daughter is going to love reading it as well.

Great gag gift! Lots of laughs

My kiddo, now seventeen, has never taken to poetry. I had Shel Silverstein and later, I fell in love all over again with Emily Dickinson. This collection made my daughter laugh. She loves reading her favorites aloud for our family. It’s been a sneaky way to prepare her for the ACT as it’s fun to discuss explications and figurative language. Its beautiful and well worth buying.

The silent war between cats and humans has been going on for thousands of years. The key reason it continues is because we don't know enough to surrender. In part this is due to cats' cleverness. They have kept the battles at such a low level, we don't know the war is going on. It rages silently, below our radar. The author of "I Could Pee on This" is breaking the news to those who have been ignorant in their bliss. The cats have won. They are in charge. You don't believe it? Well, who's the one cleaning the litter box? Francesco Marciuliano knows cats. From feline typewriter fixation to toilet paper destruction to shattered wineglasses, the man has suffered––as have we all––at the paws of cats. And for the love of the diabolical little suckers, he––as do all we cat captives––keeps coming back for more. See "This Is My Chair" for your Cat's attitude towards property rights, "Busy, Busy" for cat sleeping habits. "I Run" reveals a cat's intense desire to appear to know what he's doing. "Tripped" and "Talk to Me" reveal your cat's devious nature and possible criminal intent. In "Kneal (sic) before Me" the true nature of Cat/human relations is revealed. "Nudge" has been my own personal experience with five cats over 60 years, so that one is absolutely dead-on right. Blush at "Man's Best Friend" because it's probably true. "Family" is very likely true––you aren't that important. Every cat is the center of his own universe. You are just a satellite. "I Lick Your Nose" is so true that I've bought thicker makeup to cover scratch scars from the cat who repositions me to suit his favored sleeping spots during the night. This is done by digging into my cheek or eye socket and pulling. When accomplished during REM sleep, I don't discover Rowdy's act of violence until I wash my face in the morning. And, of course, the title piece says it all: Your cat will dominate you at every turn. I laughed all the way through "I Could Pee on This," often reading pertinent verses to my husband as we lay in the dark, me reading my Kindle, he drifting off to sleep. He didn't always react as I would have hoped. I'm hoping it was because he was half-asleep. I've converted him to being a cat person. But does the dog person in him still prevail? Rowdy, Jeep, Liam, Smokey and I must get together and work on him. If forty-two years of cat domination haven't quite converted him yet, we'll have to take more drastic action.... KL

We have shared our home with from one to three cats at a time for over 50 years so the poems in this book brought a welcome smile to my face!

Vraiment drôle et bien écrit. A condition que vous lisiez l'anglais. Et que vous aimez les chats. De petits poèmes humoristiques et tendres qui racontent le monde du point de vue des chats. Extrait du poème titre :"You ignore me ignoring you."

Este libro es súper rápido y lindo de leer. Contiene poemas que supuestamente escribe un gato lo cual resulta muy gracioso y son muy bonitos. Es un excelente regalo para amantes de los gatos.

Gave this to my little brother as a gift, and he thinks it’s hilarious. He specifically said he just wants books about cats now because of this book. 10/10

Questo è un libro di poesie e giochi di parole che celebra in maniera fortemente ironica e sarcastica le abitudini dei gatti. è diretto a chi ama tanto i gatti! non solo nel senso di curarli e averli intorno ,ma soprattutto saperli costantemente in cerca delle nostre attenzioni e capaci in ogni maniera di sconvolgere la quotidianeità di noi esseri umani ! Here it is a great poems and "rigmaroles" book. It celebrates ,in a very ironic and sarcastic way, the habit of cats . It's a perfect reading por cats-lovers and not only that! loving cats it's not only to take care of them or to spend time with them but , above all, it's to suffer their way to mess up our routine ! their way to take the piss out of us and to make fun of us!their way to atract our care <3

The deep reflections written through the lines of the poems featured on this book changed the way I see the world around me. The line "I could pee everywhere" made me realize I have control over my own life and how dated morals are the only thing separating my "could" from my "should", and my free will is real, and my actions should be based on what I think is right or wrong, not what others may think. Truly incredible. The poem "seriously brings deep discussions about fragile masculinity, narrating the story of a cat that thinks that his life is over because he had his testies removed...